Rayna

Give us your life story.

It was just me and my mum at home. I first went to a Catholic school, then I got expelled for doing drugs in the bathroom! Then I went to another high school, and I ended up running away to Dad’s in Tauranga for half a year. Then I came back, moved out of home right away and lived in a terrible flat in Grey Lynn where there were mice everywhere. So yeah I don’t have NCEA or anything but somehow I managed to get into an arts school to do a BA in Fine Arts, I’m doing sculpture and painting.

Do you and your Mum get on?

Yeah, we’re like best friends now. Moving out really helped the relationship and now we talk everyday. But yeah we went through a period where we hated each other, and I think that moving out helped her gain some respect for me. It changed it because when I lived at home she was really protective and wouldn’t let me do anything so I sneaked out. But now I’ve moved out and I’m living my own life and it’s better.

Well you’re officially 18. Do you feel like an adult?

I think I turned 18 at 14! When I was 14 I was hanging out with 18 year olds, making adult decisions, I thought I was an adult. Looking back now, I thought I was making good decisions. But maybe I’d change a few things. I probably should have listened to Mum’s advice a bit more! But I feel younger now. It’s strange, now I am actually living like an adult, I don’t feel like one at all.

What do you reckon the most pressing issues facing young women today are?

Probably mental health issues. Like the centre’s where you go as a kid who need counselling are the most horrible buildings. When I went it didn’t feel like a supportive place. So many of my mates have had suicide attempts and even when they go to hospital they still feel abandoned – even at their lowest low. Between the ages of 14 and 17 was the worst for me. It was just all school stuff.

So it sounds like school was shit?

I hated high school so much. It was an only girls school with lots of bullying, it happened to me, I did it to other, it was everywhere. Girls schools are horrible, like a lot of girls were self harming, it was awful for body image and there was lots of drugs too. I was hanging out with older people so I’d get them for free … it was bad. Especially if you were sucked into that cycle. Like a few of my friends from those days are in prison, one’s pregnant, and I don’t know some of the others are. I’m lucky mum did help me and sent me to get counselling. She stepped in which made me hate her more, but now looking back I’m grateful. Some of my friends don’t have that, their mum’s just got angry at them instead of helping them.

So what’s changed for you?

I started going to Uni which gave me a lot of stability and routine. I love the teachers and they were really supportive, and it’s an environment I actually want to be in. I now don’t rely on drugs to be happy. I can be satisfied with high marks. And as soon as I moved out, I stopped going out, no parties, nothing … I wanted to do everything when I lived at Mum’s because I couldn’t do anything. Now I have moved I don’t want to do anything!

Some people say your generation is the Nana generation, you stay in and are more sensible than previous generations. Is it still cool to go out and get smashed and hook up?

It’s half and half. half of my friends are going out all night, new guy every night, party party party. They’re having the time of their lives. But also a lot of my mates think it’s cool to be in a long term relationship. Most are in a 2+ year relationship.

So what is the epitome of cool for Gen Z?

Like on instagram, which is immediately what I thought of when you said cool, cool is just people who are always doing different things. They can go out, get drunk and and get high but also do yoga and meditate. They go to the beach, have a good relationship with their parents and healthy relationships. If you’re not doing that, it feels like you’re falling behind a bit. Don’t fall behind. If you haven’t moved out, got a job, started uni, you’re falling behind, if you haven’t had a relationship you’re falling behind.

Give me three words to describe being 18?

Busy, fun, boring. And we’re also the people who are meant to “be something.” Everyone’s saying we’re the future, so that’s pressure!

What do you want for your future?

I want to be an art therapist. Mental health in NZ would be helped so much by art therapy. In ten years my big dream is to have my own arts therapy place. My team can go to prisons or primary school or mental health institutes to do therapy. I want a nice family, chickens, a veggie patch … And to live of the land, have a fireplace, be the by beach, have kids … but I also don’t want kids at all with how the climate is going.

What’s one word to sum up how you feel about the future?

Hopeful. You gotta be optimistic!